But no one said it would be so lonely, never-ending, groundhog day, I would rather watch paint dry than pickup those toys again, lets just throw money down the drain rather than cook and serve meals that end up all over the table and floor, why do you not hear me calling but you hear the crinkle of a biscuit packet frustrating either.....
I love my kiddos, and I love being a mumma. I love so much about it, and I'm sure I will write a post about that soon just so I don't feel like a moaner. But some days/weeks/months I just want to scream. I get one room tidy to clean another and come back and the first one is messy again. Meals never get eaten without moaning and food wasted. Fights oh the fights..... it just seems to take it out of me over the day til the end of the day feels like a lifetime away and I just want to run and hide. Ive taken to putting my ipod on and actually ignoring it all for a bit just so I don't flip my lid (heck don't I sound like a awesome parent??).
I know it will get better and my depressing woe is me rut will pass or at least seem to pass til the next one arrives but man oh man I need a stiff drink tonight.. lol
On the plus side outside my lounge window (on the neighbours property) there is a tree... its not an exciting tree BUT at night when the sky is changing colours til darkness hits I love this tree... the changing sky looks so pretty behind this tree, it lights the branches and foliage just so and I love it... its utterly enchanting.. I imagine a group of fairies working away inside that tree that's how it enchants me.. of course no one else would find this tree enchanting but I find myself wasting an hour at night just staring out the window at the tree and the sky.
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